 I'm
often asked what benefits one can expect from sitting
an Insight Meditation Retreat, as against attending
a weekly meditation class or sitting regularly at home.
It is as different as an hors d'oeuvre from a banquet.
Daily or weekly sittings can help to keep a general
balance and perspective in one's life, although in times
of strong stress or anxiety this may be difficult to
sustain. A Retreat gives uninterrupted deep periods
of stillness that then ripple out through every aspect
of one's life, not just for a day, but for weeks and
months after.
We live in such a hectic world, bombarded by media,
noise, demands, schedules and then at the mercy of our
own and other's hopes, fears, thoughts and expectations.
It is difficult to find yourself, let alone 'be' yourself,
when under such pressure. And even if you are retired
or working to your own schedule, the voice within, our
in-built critic, may give little room for true relaxation
and contentment.
 After
7 years as a monk at the Serpentine Buddhist Monastery,
a friend recently disrobed due to long-term health concerns.
He remarked that his strongest challenge was to adjust
to the deluge of stimulation we experience in everyday
modern life. Even without distracting himself by watching
television, or reading newspapers, at every turn he
finds he is beset with continual noise and visual stimulation.
On Retreat, even if just for a weekend, the quiet is
a balm which nourishes the inner being. Rather than
missing talking, most people find the silence immensely
satisfying once they drop into a deeper layer and then
may find, with surprise, they have some reluctance to
re-emerge. Life is simplified. Although one can adjust
the schedule as one's personal health requires, no other
choices or tasks impinge. Even the brief selected daily
chore, such as meal preparation or cleaning, is undertaken
as an opportunity for awareness, for being present with
movement, action, thoughts, sounds.
If you continually note distractions and then let them
go, coming back to this actual moment, then the mind
starts to clear, emotions settle and a happiness, which
is our natural state, surfaces. When not jaded by over-satiation,
each sense become sharper and can be appreciated fully.
Food tastes delicious when eaten slowly and mindfully,
each flavour distinct. The eyesight clears, colours
are brighter, bird song is so fresh and sweet and clear.
 Chronic
health problems including insomnia, indigestion, high
blood pressure, migraines, skin complaints and anxiety,
to name a few, are reduced or disappear and the immune
system is kick started. As we relax more deeply, muscles
and skin relax and become softer.
The chest opens up, breathing patterns change and the
emotions relax in response. Feelings of gratitude, generosity,
acceptance, compassion, joy and love can rise without
effort. We merely clear away the mind debris and over
stimulation to find that this is our natural state of
being.
I usually reach a space somewhere on each retreat
where I romantically decide to do this 'forever', to
enter a monastery and spend my life in meditation. I
laugh, for like everything in life, it changes, and
I realise I've been distracted by planning for the future,
escaping from the reality of 'just this moment'.
And that is the total beauty of it, experience is
always changing. Thoughts come and go. Emotions come
and go. Yet inevitably will come a sticking point. Some
fear or hate or wanting will rear its head and we are
stuck, totally caught up in an old memory, feeling it
again as we replay it in the mind. It is at this point
that we must stop and befriend our fear or hate or wanting.
We do this by letting the felt body experience wash
through us, but this time with awareness and without
the usual self-justifying story line. That means if
we are experiencing anger, that we let ourselves feel
the tightness in the belly, the held breath, the clenched
jaw, the adrenaline rush that are the body feelings
that accompany this emotion. We accept it without blame
or guilt.
 This
can take some practice, to learn to watch these sensations
without being consumed by the whole mind drama that
goes with them. As we sit more purely in the actual
emotion, it is simplified. Once we can see it just as
"anger", instead of "my anger which I'm
totally justified in feeling", then the power goes
out of it and it eventually dissipates.
By doing this we are being compassionate and kind to
ourselves. We are released from the hold of the emotion
and we experience freedom. While all this can happen
in a weekly class, the whole process is magnified on
Retreat, and we move through and clear out states we
may just choose to ignore or avoid in less intensive
practice.
Acceptance of ourselves just as we are in this moment,
leads to the deepest peace. Relaxation occurs on the
deepest visceral level and brings lightness and a sense
of expansion. As I begin to let go of my tight identification
with the body, gradually there arises the knowing that
all beings and all things are inextricably linked. We
are all connected. The 'I' becomes part of the greater
whole and I know it in the centre of my being.
 Insight
meditation is a Buddhist practice, but all are welcome.
Retreats bring many riches that could take years to
find if we just sat weekly. If you can attend the whole
9 days, the rewards are immense, but even a two or three
days can bring great healing and clear out all the mind
chatter. And the experiences are both accumulative and
life changing.
by Bavali Hill
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